Germ Warfare

No Telling

I look a lot like our gal Medusa right now. I’m not kidding.

Forget worrying about H1N1. At this point I think it’s a smoke screen for all the other menaces a few thousand freshman students can sling at you in the close proximity of the classroom. I’ve spent the last three days captive to some bug or other that’s nothing like The Swine. The germ-throwers caught me looking the other way and gave me a very uncomfortable stomach flu.

That’s okay. I’m felling better tonight and now I’ve got my head on a swivel for all their non-Swine health bombs. What’s next – strep? staph? mono? pink-eye? No matter. I’m onto their game now.

Tomorrow I’m going into class in an antibacterial Cloak of Invisibility. If anyone pokes fun, I’ll shoot ’em with Lysol and turn them to stone.

W.W.V.L.S? (What Would Vince Lombardi Say?)

No Telling

I’ve put this off for a few days, what with the holiday and Michael Jackson’s memorial service and all. If you think about it, this may have been Sarah Palin’s exit strategy – resign as governor of Alaska while everyone’s looking the other way with a sparkly white glove in one hand and a bottle rocket in the other.

While I’m perfectly comfortable seeing Sarah to the door, I’m afraid she’s going to keep coming back up like one of those pop-up arcade games you hit with a rubber hammer. You know, the kind they have at Playworld. She was back in front of the cameras today, as a matter of fact. Waders and full make-up. You can’t whine about the media and then invite them all to watch you fish.

My father has a lot of sayings, and while none of them has anything specifically to do with fishing, point guards, or the governorship of a large and sparsely populated state, they all center around Doing The Right Thing. That “thing” inevitably means finishing what you start.

“Winners never quit and quitters never win. ” ~Vince Lombardi

So go do your thing, Sarah, whatever it is. Just remember that no amount of spin makes abdicating sworn responsibility any prettier. Too many folks are onto the Politics of Shiny Objects, and they’re weary.

There. I’m done. Time to grab a burned leftover hot dog and watch Thriller one more time.

UPDATE: Here’s Palin’s resignation speech – Vanity Fair’s “Edited Version.” Priceless.