Dear Retail Mucky-Mucks,

While other parts of the country religiously begin school just after Labor Day, around here the powers that be want school to start this week. You know, when it’s a nice and sultry 100+ degrees and the humidity makes the air palpable. It’s like breathing hot jello.

I’m trying very hard to remember what it was like as a school child in all those unairconditioned 1960’s classrooms. I know one whole wall was nothing but crank-windows and they were mostly open, but that’s because I recall fighting off errant wasps instead of the heat. Is this truly a sign of global warming, or was I too worried about playing on the monkeybars to care?

Regardless, I was reading a post about the horrors of back-to-school clothes shopping at Crazy Texas Mommy (I love her) and she brought up the tricky business of out-of-season shopping. She’s right, your stores are filled with sweaters and long pants and all manner of Fall bits, but Fall won’t happen around here until late October. Maybe not even then.

So what happened to all those summer clothes? They went on half-of-half sometime in late June. They’re gone, baby, and you’re not reordering. The Recession ate our school clothes.

It’s a double whammy. Somewhere all you retail CEOs are sitting around in turtlenecks and throwing back hot toddies. I’m guessing you’re enjoying mid-August somewhere in the Berkshires where folks have four distinct seasons. Down here, we can only dream and sling sweat.

In ragged old Summer clothes, no less.

Sincerely,

Monda