Take Care of Your Knees, Whippersnappers

No Telling

You only have two, and it has been my experience recently that while you can get by with one good one for a while, two good knees are preferable. Trust me on this.

All those foolish things you did when young and vigorous? Well, they’re going to come back and haunt you when you’re older and less springy. There’s no talking to the idiocy of youth, however, and I’m sure I wouldn’t have listened two seconds had someone warned me. We’re all bullet-proof and immortal until we reach our forties, and little can be done to stop that train.

I had my knee surgery on Friday, and there’s more to such a thing than I’d imagined. On paper, it sounds cut and dried, but I didn’t have my scope on paper. I had it in the hospital like everyone else. Unlike everyone else, it seems I tend to wake up once put down. This happened once before during a carpal tunnel surgery, but that’s a funny story and involves me – in medias res – illuminating the surgeon on the finer points of correct procedure. I woke up in recovery to a gaggle of laughing nurses and other amused onlookers.

Luckily, I don’t remember much about waking up during Friday’s knee surgery. It appears I woke more than once, however, and they really put the anaesthesia to me. The result was a tricky 48 hours of scoline pain. I don’t wish that on my worst enemy. It’s right up there with labor pain, except everywhere – I couldn’t get out of a chair or even hold a pen.

All that’s over now and soon I expect to be better than new. Better than before all that damage I did back in my late teens and early twenties, anyway, when I was limber and bullet-proof.

7 thoughts on “Take Care of Your Knees, Whippersnappers

  1. At 42, I’m having shoulder and hip pain each morning when I get up. It depends on the side I sleep on. Never get a full night’s sleep anymore. And I keep thinking, I’m only in early forties…what else do I have to look forward to?

  2. My advice is to start working on your injury story now. I failed to do this, and when people asked what happened, I had nothing interesting. We can’t do jack about the getting-older thing, but we can have a good narrative. I was caught unprepared – don’t you be.

  3. I have so many aches & pains that it is just hilarious to get up in the morning. Hate getting older if this gets any worse. LOL!Good luck on your recovery!

  4. My advice to young people is, have kids while you’re still young! Don’t go having them in your late 30s like I did. No matter how good of shape you were in before, they will <>destroy<> your joints!(Don’t forget your back.)Oh, yes. They will <>destroy<> your back as well!

  5. Thanks, Bob, and good luck with your own aches and such!Oh, you’re not kidding, Olivander. I had my girl at 24 and it was a breeze. Swinging around the Perfect Grandson is tricky business now that I’m forty-mumble. I may have to get everything realigned just to keep up.

  6. I once read an article by a medical journalist stating that the human knee was really only designed to last about 35 years. So, I figure you and I and our parts are mostly past their sell-by date. Now’s the time we start replacing and removing them. We’re like old cars…..Glad you’re feeling a bit more chipper now.

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